"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Randomize
