It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We need a shit load of segways right now
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
