His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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