I wanna bring you to show and tell
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i will never coherently bang her
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
BRING THE BAGELS
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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