just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
