Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
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