in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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