jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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