I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
