I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
