the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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