I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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