My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
