i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize