she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
