Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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