school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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