Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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