i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
