Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
