WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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