How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
