I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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