when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize