We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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