with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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