Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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