bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
