tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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