No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
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