Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
