CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I think I have vodka in my lungs
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
