She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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