Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
