I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
