I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
