I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
