Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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