Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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