Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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