Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
