Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You took a bar mat shot.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
