google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
