My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
