doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
