whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
