I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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