It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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