I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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