Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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